Well Rehearsed Lines

Hey everyone. This a poem for all of us in the political village. It is especially dedicated to those in all parties who have ever attended a candidate training day.

The poem is dedicated in particular to the man who delivered a session I had the privilege of attending as the part of the process of the SNP candidate selection process for the 2012 council elections.

It was a great day and was an excellent networking opportunity as I considered putting myself forward for selection. So I have to give a special mention to the man who made the day so enjoyable and that is Councillor Graeme Hendry.

Having worked as a trainer I know how difficult delivering a successful session can be but that is exactly what he did. However no matter your persuasion I hope you’ll enjoy this tongue in check look at training days it’s called Well Rehearsed Lines and whilst most of is factual some of it is based on the advice the public think we should get rather than what we do. Anyway I hope you enjoy the read.

Well Rehearsed Lines

Remember your lines
you’ve got them well rehearsed
you know your stuff
hustings can be tough
but so can door to door
short simple sentences
don’t be a bore
leave that to others
one of the reasons
you were discovered
then selected
is you look like the type
who will get elected
or at least stand a chance
if it’s not a winnable seat
the party will be content
if you advance the cause
with an increased share of the vote
which we think you will deliver
for god’s sake don’t gibber
on and on about rivals
be civil
they hate that
when your going to the flats
try to make sure
all bases are covered
ethnicity religion single mothers
it would be good if you had
at least one or two of each
in your leafleting team
always work in pairs
especially in the schemes
it saves you from looking lost
or being sidetracked by the opposition
remember you are on a mission to win
court popularity but not too much
stay in touch with community groups
right it’s time to rally the troops
we have voters to convince
don’t talk mince you don’t have the time
so go forth for the party
and whatever you do
remember your lines
they should be
well rehearsed by now

@ Gayle Smith 2012

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