Lost The Plot

Hey everyone As this is Saturday I thought I would post a poem about what has happened to me and so many others on a Saturday night at the dancing on a girls night out. The title of the poem is Lost The Plot I hope you enjoy the read.

Lost The Plot

It’s Saturday night and it’s time to go out
meet up with my pals
I can’t think of anything better
than a night on the town with the girls
I slap on the make up
choose the right dress
I’m ready for what the night holds
with a million and one possibilities
in this evening still to unfold

Jennifer’s wearing a mini
so short that you see things you shouldn’t
Amanda does party at Primark
It’s the only way if your a student
Tracy she is miss designer
Versace and Gucci are friends
as we head round the bars I start thinking
just when is the fun going to end.

Though I will guarantee it’s about to
my instinct says nightmare ahead
will Tracey be snared by a shark on the pull
will Jenny end up with a ned
I secretly fear that it’s my turn
It was poor Amanda’s last week
she got collared by old John Revolting
The 70’s disco freak

She couldn’t escape from his clutches
during Saturday Night Fever And Grease
The guy had so many medallions
it took hours for the clanking to cease
he’d escaped from a halloween theme night
well at least that’s the story he told
Freddy Kruger watch out
there’s a horror about
and he’s stolen the Gallowgate gold

As we get to the dancing we’re laughing well we’re women it’s Saturday night
though we know we’ll find plenty of mingers and snobs
there’s a chance we might meet Mr Right
First up it’s Ally with Attitude
he’s good looking yes, but he knows it
then wee Sun Bed Steve how did he get in here?
his tongue’s stuck in Jennifer’s throat

Next to impress is Big Dougie or most girls call him Big Dug
Then your Malkied for sure there is no known cure
If your ever taken in by this mug
then Tracy got Dennis the area menace
and Amanda she hooked up with Scott
Me I pull Darren the dishy wee darling
and suddenly I’ve lost the plot

Well I start to get tongue tied go quiet and shy
this just isn’t me as you know
my face it turns scarlet
my lust is full on
my checks have a warn rosy glow
he guides me towards him
we start to get close
we enjoy an embrace then another
then my friends re-appear say the taxi’s outside
and I leave without getting his number

To say I’m not pleased would obvious
especially when Tracy says well
Dennis is gorgeous and minted
he really believes I’m his girl
Amanda says Scott’s just too good to be true and Jenny claims sun bed is hot
maybe I might spend next weekend at home
but I’d end up just losing the plot

@ Gayle Smith 2007

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