Wardrobe Malfunction

Hey everyone. This is a poem with which all women will identify as there is not one of us it hasn’t happened to at least a dozen times. It is based on a true story which happened to me  recently just as I was about to leave home to attend a media training event at Tollcross as part of Glasgow East Women For Independence. I have given it the title Wardrobe Malfunction I hope you enjoy the read.

Wardrobe Malfunction

You know that moment when
your ready to leave to the house
then suddenly you see
a massive stain on your blouse
or an irritating mark on your top
you don’t have time to go to the shops
there is no time for crying
your going to be late for wherever that meeting
or the much needed catch up with friends                                                                            ok your not dressing to be on trend
but why now?
why an hour ago
wardrobe malfunctions
drive me round the bend
and up the wall
all I wanted to do
was get dolled up for a night out
ripped tights I can just about handle
stains on my blouse
are another matter completely
which if I’m honest
I can do without
when I saw this mark
I wanted to shout, or scream
In the meantime fuming quietly
I ran riot in my head
whilst rummaging through my drawers
I wanted to roar then cry
only women will know why
and no boys you do not understand
what it’s like
so don’t even try to say you do
your only concern making sure
you can button up your jeans
nightmares and dreams
come together for girls
we live in the real world
this is a female problem
which with patience
we will always manage to solve
before going out the door
we’ve done it so many times before
It’s something we don’t talk about though we never ignore it
we just disappear in to our room
until the problem is resolved
and we’re ready to step out in style

@ Gayle Smith 2015


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