Mad Dogs, True Scots, And A Marriage Made In Cyberspace The Story Of The New Mr And Mrs Marshall

Hey everyone One of the reasons I had to wait till today before finishing my eulogy to Tony Benn was I knew I had a lot to say and couldn’t type at a fast enough speed to get it finished on time as I had a very important event to attend in Cambuslang at 3 o’clock yesterday afternoon. Please note that by yesterday I mean Friday 14th March as since it was posted in the first moments of this morning that it was actually written on the 15th.

As for the momentous event whilst it may not have made the national news was certainly good news for the Marshall family and friends who gathered to celebrate the wedding of the youngest of the clan and the only son of the family Edward who was marrying his partner of two years Louise at Cambuslang Register Office.

This was a day to celebrate not only for the happy couple for those closest to them including Ed’s big sister Janette who as some as you will know is my best friend and flatmate. Having known the groom for the last 14 years I have come to think of him as my wee brother as well as Janette’s and I’m chuffed to bits to see him settling down with a woman who is sensitive and smart as was she stunning in her wedding dress yesterday. This is especially true as Ed turned 40 just ten days before his wedding and is now beginning to act so sensibly that his mum and sister have no choice but to treat him as an adult. He is and I’m really proud to say it fulfilling all the promise and potential that some of us always believed he had.

Yet the road for Edward has not always been an easy one and I have to warn Louise that he has had a tendency to wander on the odd occasion or two. Indeed it has been said usually by me that if Ed had my interest in politics the only two Government portfolios he could have been given would have been transport and sport. Well let’s have a look at the facts and when you’ve done so you will find the statement very difficult to disagree with.

Ed’s wanderings started at the age of four or five when he obviously decided adults were boring and went for a walk without of course telling them. When the family realised he had gone on a walkabout, a phrase which would later be re-named his mum and sister as a disappearing act or an Edward, they contacted the local police, interpol,Inter Milan and Inter flora before was returned by the local police having been found at Cambuslang railway station watching the trains. When asked how he got there he insisted that the dog took him a for walk. As you can see the bold Ed had great political talent in the sense that he had the ability to talk his way out of tricky situations from a very early age.

His fondness for transport was also recalled by his mother who said that when younger Ed had a habit of travelling on buses just for the sake of it. I can’t help but thinking that in the PC world of 21st century Britain this would simply not be allowed to happen. However it never stopped Edward’s wandering instincts. Well when he decided to join a football team where did he go? Was it to one of the many local teams in Cambuslang or even the neighbouring area of Rutherglen? No that would have been far too easy for our Ed, so naturally he decided to wander a wee bit further afield and join a team in Moodiesburn well it takes two buses to travel from Cambuslang to Moodiesburn.

So much for his playing the beautiful game but when it comes to supporting a team it is fair to say Ed and I are opposite sides of one football’s most traditional rivalries. Not for Ed the green and white hoops of Celtic the blue of Rangers has always been the colour of his team of choice. This brings me to another of his wanderings though this time big sister Janette has to shoulder the blame.

The year was 1990 and Glasgow was the cultural capital of Europe and Rangers are playing at Tynecastle in an away game against Hearts. Bearing this in mind Janette got two return tickets for the football special. Unfortunately however what she didn’t get were tickets for the game. The result of this forgetfulness was that whilst everyone else on train got to see another victory for their team, Ed and his sister had to be content with a very pleasant stroll round the streets of our capital. On the bright side however they were first to board the train for the return journey to Glasgow. So I just thought I would give the bride you a heads up that Ed has been known to go his own unique way on the odd occasion or two. Thankfully however it was his wandering instincts which proved to be the making of him as one day he wandered on to the internet and found love in the shape of Barrow based London lass Louise Williams and the rest as they say is history.

As for the day itself, I was up early, I had to be to get my outfit sorted and then get a bit glammed up for the big event. As it was Janette and I left Baillieston at 11 o’clock and arrived at her mum’s house in Cambuslang just over two hours later at around 1.20 PM. On arrival, we were told that Ed would be driving Janette and I to the venue at around 2PM. As is always the case on wedding day’s the timing was a wee bit out and Ed finally arrived to collect us at 10 to 3 which was not a moment too soon for his big sister who was threatening to go home if he hadn’t arrived by 3 o’clock. Fortunately however it was a case of comes the hour comes the man and all was well that ended well and we and Ed got to the venue on time.

At this stage I spotted that a significant number of the bridal party had already arrived and due to the harsh mid March winds one of the girls was having a Marilyn Monroe moment as she tried rescue her dress from showing more of her than her modesty wanted or her decency demanded. As weddings go this was a good ice breaker and got us chatting whilst Janette was giving Ed some well chosen words of advice.

The ceremony itself was beautifully conducted by South Lanarkshire Deputy Registrar Gemma Dickson even if there were a few giggles from a clearly nervous bride and groom. Eventually they did reach the part where they were pronounced man and wife but not before beautifully delivered readings from the bride’s sister Pauline and our very own Janette. As we congratulated the happy couple I couldn’t help but notice the biggest smile I have ever seen on Ed’s face in the 14 years I’ve known him.

After the ceremony it was back to the flat of the newly wed Mr and Mrs Marshall for some nibbles and drinks before heading to the official reception at Shawfield Stadium once home to Clyde football club and now the West of Scotland’s premier greyhound race track.

However we before going back to the flat there was a moment of comedy gold as we waited for everyone to get their taxi it was the best man Barry who had the rest of us giggling as he proved his credentials as a true scot when his kilt blew in mid air to reveal precisely nothing. Yes the boy had gone commando and had the bare faced check or should be cheeks to show it.

Back at the flat as everyone mixed and mingled there was one unfortunate soul who was in the process of being mangled as Janette could get no peace from Boston the happy couple’s over friendly Staffordshire Bull Terrorist. Oops I mean terrier though on second thoughts I think Janette would have more than a feeling I was right in my first assessment of this lovable if slightly demented pet.

Anyway, eventually Boston was put back in it’s living quarters and it was time for the taxis to take us to Shawfield for a night at the races. Honestly you usually wait for a good few years before a marriage has gone to the dogs, not in this case, this couple did it before the honeymoon.

I have to say the reception was lovely and the main course which a choice of Black Pudding or Haggis I had Black Pudding, wrapped in chicken with traditional vegetables of carrots, peas and potatoes was particularly enjoyable

After the speeches which were I have to say very short compared to most of the weddings I’ve attended, I think we all had a wee bet on the greyhounds and I must one of a very few people to leave a wedding with more money than I had at the start of the night. At around half past 9
Janette and I shared a taxi back to Cambuslang with her mum and her friend Frances at the end of what had been a long but enjoyable day and as I got in to the taxi I noticed my left shoe had fallen off. Honestly where’s Prince Charming when you need him? As we left the taxi the driver said we were the four quietest woman he had ever had in his can. This proves the age of miracles is not dead.

As Janette and I eventually got back to Baillieston almost 12 hours after we had left it, we were left to reflect on a happy but hectic day and send our love to the new Mr And Mrs Marshall to Ed and Louise may they share a lifetime of love and happiness and give a message to Jeremy Kyle that sometimes a marriage made in cyberspace can actually work.

Love And Best Wishes
Gayle X


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