Rules And Restrictions Are A Crime Against Girls But They Teach Us How To Deal With Disapointments

Hey everyone I know some people may have been expecting me to write a post on a Mr Guido Peter Fawkes otherwise known as Guy particularly as there are rockets and sparklers going off all over Baillieston as I write. However me being me I have chosen be deliberately different and talk about a major equality issue namely the way boys and girls are socialised and impact this conditioning has on them for better or worse.

You see I was watching this morning the other day and they were chatting about serial killers something which I always find disturbing. However though the topic did not interest me too much the subtext of the conversation certainly did. You see during the discussion one of the presenters asked why do men kill more than women? and I have to say I was intrigued by the answer. You see the expert said that to a certain extent it comes down to differences as so many other things do, in the way that men and women are socialised as children
I have to say it was this part of the discussion which really interested me.

The expert said that whilst girls are to a significant extent socialised within the home, boys are told to get out of the house and do manly things from the earliest possible age. This is in stark contrast to girls who are taught to be passive and focused on domestic roles within the family home.
This means that whilst girls grow up with more social control which can limit us in certain ways when it comes to opportunities, I would say that there swings as well as well roundabouts in the gender lottery.

I also believe that what may be detrimental in one respect may also be beneficial in another. This I believe is particularly true in terms of emotional development. It is true to say that girls mature faster than boys and I believe being able to face the complex world of emotions better equips us to deal with the realities of life.

Even the social and cultural restrictions we face have one positive outcome. They teach us that sometimes we have to accept rules in life and not sulk in our rooms when things don’t go to plan. So whether we want to or not and many times it’s the latter we have to learn to exercise far quicker than boys who seem to get away with so much more from a very early age.

However this may not be as good for them as they would like to think as they don’t learn how to deal with disappointments in the way girls do. In fact I would suggest that it could be that the lack of restraint in terms of how boys play, some of the toys they are allowed to play, and what they are allowed to get away with which may mean they develop a more ruthless and potentially if it’s allowed to develop a very nasty streak to their nature.

I justify my last comment by saying that whilst girls are subject to a great number of social rules and norms boys don’t seem to be judged in the same way and though their may be referees when they play football or leaders in uniformed organisations who will impart a degree of discipline to them. There are no rules when it comes to climbing trees or playing Cowboys and Indians. This was the standard game for boys right up until the mid to late 1970’s and the whole aim of it was to kill your opponents as quickly as you can. It is my view that promoting a game based on this mentally, whether it be Cowboys or its computer based successors fosters an individualism and selfishness which at best can be described as unhealthy and at worst potentially dangerous. Therefore the fact boys enjoy more freedom than girls at a younger age cannot be ignored and can be argued to be a mitigating factor in creating the circumstances which lead to gender inequality. This is especially true in such a patriarchal society that was the Scotland or indeed Britain of the 1970’s.

I also readily accept what may have been good for me was good because some people didn’t know it was good for me and what worked for me may actually have been detrimental to the potential,interests, and advancement of many young girls on their journey to womanhood.

Now some may say that I am too much of a bleeding heart liberal leftie and there is no such thing as environmental socialisation. I have to say it is my belief that these people are inhabiting cloud cuckoo land and have no concept of reality. Yes I know they will say that socialisation and self control have no connection as to whether someone will commit crime or not but whilst I am in no way suggesting that all boys with commit crime such a suggestion would be both offensive and ridiculous I am saying that perhaps because of lack of organisational and structured activities leads them to believe they can get away with more than any girl ever will do. After all, you never hear a parent tell a boy your not going out dressed like that.

Love And Best Wishes
Gayle X

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